Too little, too late

Wow.

This could have actually been considered slightly classy...if it had come in late December.

Now it's just sad.

Johnny, you think the Red Sox didn't "respect" you? I still think $40m is a lot of respect, but I guess everything is relative.

We'll move on, as we'll be going Loco for Coco, but you might not when you realise what a cavernous park Yankee Stadium is.

That might happen not only when you're running for a fly ball, but also when you can't seem to get your average above .300. There's a reason why Yankee Stadium is considered a pitchers park, whereas Fenway is traditionally a hitters park (at least for the home team...).

Cheese

The "Special One" has now broken the silence over the previously mentioned Robbengate, a.k.a How to hit the deck in 1 second flat without pain. Although Chelsea have reportedly been privately embarrassed about Robben's behaviour, Mourinho now feels enough is enough.

His main defensive argument goes back to the obviously still stinging Champions League defeat to Liverpool.

Liverpool question the moral actions of our player, but I do not remember them questioning anyone last May when the ball did not cross the line and the players were running to the officials putting pressure on them to give a goal.

It is almost comical how everyone affiliated to Chelsea have conveniently left out the part that if ref Lubos Michel had not played the advantage for Garcia, he would have had no other option than to give a penalty to Liverpool and send off Peter Cech for clattering into Milan Baros.

Don't think 'Pool would have won with a penalty kick to be taken and Chelsea down to 10 men after 4 minutes? As an American female teenager would have said - Puh-lease...

Fall guys

I got an interesting idea in this article in the Times, regarding our favourite thespian Arjen Robben.

From now on, I'll create my own weekly Letterman top five, highlighting the top floppers, divers and cheaters in the Premiership, starting this weekend.

Stay tuned.

Quotes, stones and concrete

Quick post with the quote of the day from the always funny Kristen's blog:

The Stones no longer cheat death. They now openly mock it and refer to it as "their bitch."

Superb...

Also, although I know the story lines have more holes in it than O.J's alibi, some elements are fantastically implausible and it's aired on satan's network - a.k.a. Fox, Prison Break is a very entertaining 42 minutes of television. UK viewers can catch this gem on Monday evenings on Five.

The resident Hollywood baddie Swede, Peter Stormare, co-stars as the mob-boss in the 'Pen', and although I love Peter's acting chops, his "Italian mob dialect" could do with some fine tuning.

Despite that, it might even tie me over until the 3rd series of Entourage starts in June. In the UK, ITV have bought the rights to series 1 and 2 and rumour has it they will air it on ITV3.

For those who haven't seen Entourage, this is the HBO comedy show based on Mark 'Funky Bunch' Wahlberg's experiences when trying to break into Hollywood. Adrian Grenier stars as Vincent Chase, up and coming movie star (competing with the likes of Colin Farrell), his half-brother Johnny 'Drama' Chase (played brilliantly by Kevin Dillon), and Eric and Turtle, two of Vincent's friend from his childhood in Queens.

However, the shining star of the show is Ari Gold - Vincent's high-powered agent, played supremely by Jeremy Piven.

The man is a quote machine, probably one of the best in the industry to deliver the slightly manic 30+ word sentences perfectly. He shone in Old School, Very Bad Things, PCU, Grosse Point Blank and Serendipity, which admittedly was quite a sappy movie, but had John Cusack, Kate Beckinsale, and a couple of fantastic quotes from Piven, including:

Pimple-faced college drop outs who have made unhealthy sums of money forming internet companies that create no concrete products, provide no viable services, and still manage to generate profits for all of its lazy day-trading son-of-a bitch shareholders.

You know Piven's up to his usual high standards when in the first Entourage episode, while driving and on the phone to Eric, stops talking on the phone temporarily and screams out the side window:

Is that the way they drive in Tiananmen Square, bitch?

Instant classic.

3rd series reportedly starts on June 20th on HBO or a torrent near you.

Hospitalised?

Nothing frustrates me more than a talented athlete that feel the need to cheat to reach his or her goals - be it doping, diving or faking.

I don't subscribe to the theory that the increase of foreign players in the Premiership are the only reason that players have increased their theatrics - Gary Lineker is famous for not being booked in his entire playing career, yet he's admitted that had the yellow card for diving rule been in place during his era, his unblemished record might be slightly less clean. Also, some of the more prolific divers are English, such as Michael Owen, Joe Cole and Emile Heskey.

However, the cream of the crop in the Premiership are, in no ranking order: Jose Reyes, Robert Pires, Ruud Van Nistelroy and Arjen Robben.

Reyes have taken a tumble so many times that it almost seems that he won't even get a legitimate free kick nowadays.

Yesterday in the Chelsea-Liverpool game, which BTW Chelsea won relatively deservedly due to Liverpool's lack of forward firepower, Robben and Chelsea stooped to new lows.

Having remarkably managed to get out of a clear cut yellow card for dissent earlier in the game, Robben came up and said something to Liverpool 'keeper Reina I'm sure shouldn't be repeated when children can hear it. Reina, who the second earlier committed a foolish tackle on Chelsea's Gudjohnsen, for which he was about to get booked, seemed to push Robben in the face (with his soft goalkeeper gloves), and Robben went down on the deck like punched by Mike Tyson, only to peek up to ensure that Reina got sent off.

Only one word can summarise that.

Scum.

Cheat. (Oops, my math has always been poor.)

Robben is a remarkably gifted footballer, but clearly sub-standard as a human being...I'd like to say I'm sure he's slightly ashamed when he sees the replay images, but I'm not sure he has any shame whatsoever.

Forest for the trees

This is a bizarre feeling - we're in what used to be the holiest of weekends for me - Super Bowl weekend, and yet I was thinking more about baseball than football.

Yes, the last few seasons haven't been fun from an 49er fan point of view, but I almost fear it's more than that. I can't quite put my finger on what has made me absorb baseball to the point that there is almost no room for football.

I still consider the slow motion replay of a deep football pass the purest form of poetry in motion in the world of sport. The build-up and quick rush of excitement when a rusher hits the hole right and seemingly slithers through 5 defenders. The power surge when the unblocked blitzing linebacker or defensive end comes free and blindsides the QB, but also the excitement of watching Mike Vick evade four defensive players in the backfield and turn a guaranteed sack into a 20 yard gain.

Despite all this, I can't seem to get worked up for a football game. Instead being glued to the screen, I'll surf in and watch 5-10 minutes, and then continue my channel surfing....

Coach Nolan, please make my Niners at least an 8-8 team, so I don't have to wear a paper bag over my head.

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On another note, I found this cool thing through the great Cursed to First blog:

Go here to make your own word cloud.